葬儀・終活コラム
参列者のマナー
香典のマナーを知ろう〜金額の相場や袋の選び方、表書きについて〜
香典 の マナー をご存じでしょうか。一度覚えたと思っても、葬儀等に参列する機会が少なければ、なかなか身につかないものです。迷ったらその都度調べて、失礼のないようにマナーを守りましょう。香典袋の選び方、間柄による香典の金額相場、表書きの書き方などについて解説します。
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【もくじ】
香典のマナーは複雑
香典 には、袋の選び方一つから マナー があります。「宗派によって袋が違ったり、表書きの書き方が違ったり……いろいろあって、頭が混乱する！」と思う人もいるでしょう。葬儀と、その他の法要とでは少しマナーが違いますから、なおさら混乱しがちです。
まずは、葬儀や法要を行う施主の宗教・宗派を知りましょう。日程の案内状などからは宗教・宗派が分からない場合には、どんな宗派にも使える袋や表書きを採用することになります。
香典のマナー１：袋の選び方
まずは香典袋を選びます。宗教によって、選ぶべき香典袋が違います。葬儀とそれ以外の法要とで、香典袋の種類が違うことはありません。
仏教の場合
黒白、あるいは黒銀、双銀の水引があしらわれた香典袋を選びます。無地または蓮の花が描かれているものです。地域によっては、黄色と白の水引があしらわれた袋が使われることもあります。
神道の場合
黒白、あるいは黒銀、双銀の水引があしらわれた無地の香典袋を選びます。地域によっては、黄色と白の水引があしらわれた袋が使われることもあります。
キリスト教の場合
水引のない無地の袋を選びます。売場にあれば、百合の花や十字架があしらわれたものを買ってもよいでしょう。
無宗教、または宗派が分からない場合
黒白、あるいは黒銀、双銀の水引があしらわれた、無地の香典袋にしましょう。キリスト教の場合は水引を外せるよう、水引はプリントされたものではなく、外せるものを選びます。
香典のマナー2：金額の相場
香典金額の相場は、間柄によって違います。葬儀の場合のほうが、法要よりも高い金額となります。また、香典を出す側の年齢が上がるにつれて、厚く包むのが一般的です。
親族以外であっても、仕事の得意先の代表など、とくにお世話になっている人へは、厚く包む場合があります。また、近隣の場合は金額が決まっているケースがあるため、地域の年長者などに確認しましょう。
香典のマナー3：表書きの書き方
表書きの書き方は、宗教・宗派によって違います。また、葬儀と法要とでも違う場合があります。
仏教の場合（葬儀）
浄土真宗以外は「御霊前」、浄土真宗の場合は「御仏前」と書きます。
仏教の場合（法要）
四十九日までは葬儀の場合と同じです。四十九日以降であれば、宗派に関わらず「御仏前」と書きます。
神道の場合（神葬祭・霊祭・直会）
「御玉串料」と書きます。
キリスト教の場合（葬儀式）
「御花料」と書きます。
無宗教、あるいは宗教、宗派が分からない場合
「御香典」としましょう。
表書きを書いたら、下に自分の名前を書きます。中袋には、自分の住所と名前、香典金額を書き入れましょう。
香典のマナー4：受付でのふるまい方
受付では、宗教、宗派に関わらず、次のようにふるまいます。
１.自分の番が来たら袱紗から香典を出す
香典はそのまま持ち歩くのではなく、袱紗に入れましょう。受付の列に並び、自分の分になったら鞄から袱紗を出し、香典を取り出します。
２.一礼して両手で香典袋を差し出し「このたびは……」と言う
「ご愁傷さまでした」と言い切る必要はなく、「このたびは……」まででよいとされます。「ご愁傷様」という言葉がそぐわない宗派もあるため、気をつけましょう。
3.差し出された黒いお盆に香典袋を置き、引換券などを受け取る
香典返しや引換券などを受け取ったら、「恐れ入ります」などと言います。黙礼だけして、何も言わなくても問題はありません。
まとめ
以上、香典に関する基本的なマナーをご案内しました。葬儀の前日には、失礼に当たらないようきちんと調べ、おさらいしておくことをお勧めします。
特殊な宗教の場合や、自分と故人との間柄が複雑と感じるなら、事情をよく知る人に相談してみましょう。それが難しければ、宗教・宗派が分からないケースと同様に、ごく一般的な香典袋を使うのがいいでしょう。
福島
